weird day at the strip
by Dr-J33
Summary: an unintelegent courier, a dress obsessed scribe, and a robot that can only speak in internet quotes search for a treacherous casino owner in a swivel chair... yep its weird


Weird day at the strip.

Shows the courier, veronica, and that robot whose name I cant properly write on the new vegas strip.

Courier: ah the strip, so calm and peaceful…

Shows the ncr troops massacring civilians in front of the lucky 38.

Courier: so calm…..

Veronica: okay lets just find benny so you can get your revenge and I can find a dress.

Courier: ok lets ask around. (turns to a fire hydrant) have you seen a guy in a checkered suit?

Hydrant:….

Courier: ….. YOU SON OF A! (pulls out a wrench and starts beating the hydrant with it)

Veronica: T_T…..

Voice: hey you.

Shows mr holdout leaning against his usual wall.

mr holdout: pst, i have something for : IS IT A DRESS!mr holdout: : then you are of no use to me! (punches him in the head causing it to explode)mortemier runs : oh boy, fresh meat! (grabs mr holdout's corpse and runs away)

Veronica: right…..

Ed-de: (plays the that's disturbing line from ed edd n eddy)

Courier: that guy over there just told me that benny is over by the tops!

Veronica: who?

Courier: him.

Shows a fiend roasting a tire over a campfire.

Fiend: retaw eht knird tnod. (dies of overdosing on nothing)

Veronica: lets go then!

courier (wearing a hat): lets do : wait, where did you get that hat?courier: that a munilated : 0-0...courier: he wouldnt give it up ok! and i really wanted that hat!edd-e: (plays laugh track)and so they went.

Shows the 3 in front of the tops.

Courier: ….. Hes not here.

Veronica: we havent even went in yet!

courier: ha! entering buildings!, that would be like wearing socks on your : you dont wear socks?courier: (wearing socks on hands) i never said : 0_0...E-dee: (in cdi- Mario's voice) luigi look!

Courier: yes Mario?

Shows raul in a purple convertible.

Raul: yo boss, check out my new ride!

Courier: how did you get a car in a post apocalyptic world!

Raul: … dangit bo-

The car explodes sending raul to an alien world….. Its Canada.

Courier: well, lets see if benny is around here somewhere.

Veronica: like where?

Shows the courier looking in a trash can.

Veronica: T_T… am I the only sane person here?

e-ddde: (in big mac's voice) eyup.

Courier: all I found was trash, some cans, and a picture of the second Kennedy assassin! No benny!

A securitron approaches the trio.

Securitron: stop! You have violated the law, I am taking your stolen goods as-

Veronica punches the securitron causing it to explode.

Courier: lets check that nearby vault for benny.

Veronica: not a bad idea.

And once again they went.

Shows veronica and ed-eded outside the vault.

Veronica: why couldn't we go in with him.

Ed-deeeeeeee: (in the medic's voice) I HAVE NO IDEA!

The courier walks in with a large sack.

Veronica: find benny?

Courier: who?…. Oh yeah…. No didn't see him.

Veronica: what were you even doing in there for… 8 hours.

Courier: totally not gambling until the place ran dry, stealling everything from everyone's room, sleeping with the blonde chick at the counter, then murdering everyone who had an r in their last name.

Veronica: o-o…. why would you-

Courier: look, its that hobo from earlier.

Shows mortimier eating Mr. holdout's corpse.

Courier: hey hobo, are you going to eat that-

Mortemier: ( in a demonic voice) BACK AWAY FROM ME MORTAL SCUM!

Courier: gulp…..

Ed-eeeeeeeeede: (in chris rock's voice) aw snap!

But before mortemier could kill him, benny ran mortemier over on a swivel chair.

Courier: ….. Hey! (takes his hat) free hat… wait. BENNY!

Benny scoots over.

Benny: hey there guy I never seen before.

Courier: you… you shot me in the head, left me for dead and worst of all!…. You stepped on a bug!

Benny: no I didn't.

Shows a dead radroach on the bottom of benny's shoe.

Courier: your evil has claimed the lives of many men. (punches benny) no longer! (punches benny again)

Benny: killing me will not make this story any more stupider than it already is!

Courier: (punches benny) I do not care about the story!

Me:…. That hurt me emotionally…..

Courier: and I (pulls out a 44 magnum and aims it at benny) will have my reven-

Benny is impaled by a large bumper sword.

Courier: 0-0.…. Uh.

Legate Lanius walks towards the 3 and removes his sword from benny's body.

Lanius: I am legate lanius!

Veronica: no duh Sherlock.

Lanius: and I have come to kill all of you! AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!

Courier: why?

Lanius: because im evil!

Courier: why?

Lanius:… well I guess it all started when I a little boy…. Always beated me with that wrench… and daddy loved those ponies than he loved me…..

Veronica: uh…..

Lanius: I guess I took out my stress on others…. You know what, im not going to do this anymore, im going to help people, not kill them! Ill make the world a better-

A giant robot foot crushes lanius.

Courier: uncle Charlie?

Shows that liberty prime crushed lanius.

Liberty prime: COMUNIST DETECTED ON AMERICAN SOIL! LETHAL FORCE INGAGED!

Veronica and courier: holy crud!

Ed-eeeeeddddededeed: (in mga snake's voice) OH COME ON!

Liberty prime: COMMUNISM IS A LIE!

Courier: ….. Wait I have an idea!

The courier picks up a pebble and tosses it at liberty prime.

Liberty prime: SYSTEM MALFUNCTION! (falls apart)

Veronica: well this was a weird day on the strip.

Ed-ed: you bet… wait THAT WASN'T AN INTERNET REFFERENCE! ERROR!TUYJTFGFRVFSV- (blue screen of death appears on his monitor)

Ed-de then falls onto the ground.

Courier:…. Great, now where am I supposed to store my hats!

Veronica: and I didn't even get my dress!

Benny's now rotten corpse splits in half to reveal a dress.

Veronica: ghasp! A DRESS! ( in rainbow dash's voice) omigosh omigosh omigosh omigosh omigosh omigosh omigosh!

Veronica takes the dress and hugs it like it was her lost girlfriend.

Me: its funny because its cannon.

Courier: looks like everyone is happy now… this is the best ending ev-

Everyone is crushed by a giant whale being ridden by raul.

Raul: suck on that boss!

THE END

Credit to;

Bethesda

Obsidian

Hasbro

Studio b

Lauren faust

Ed edd n eddy

Trearch

Anything else I missed.

Me: I cant believe I wrote this, eh least im not uploading it… wait. Its already up?… -


End file.
